Last Call Page 18

  The conversation shifts to Devon’s new girlfriend, until he brings it back to me.

  “So who’s the girl who broke your heart?”

  “Her name is Ada,” Enzo says. He catches my eye, as if asking whether he should continue. I shrug. What does it matter? Besides, I trust Devon. He and Enzo have known each other since they were little kids.

  “She’s on the team for our drug approval at the FDA.”

  “The project manager, actually,” I add.

  Devon’s face says it all. “Sounds like a bad idea . . . for her.”

  “And for us too,” I explain. “We’ve already been delayed because our former RPM moved to California. If Ada and I were caught, or if she decided to tell her boss about us, we’d be assigned a new manager. That would mean more delays.”

  He knows about the terms of the loan.

  “Ouch. So what happened?”

  Someone at the far end of the bar starts shouting, but I have no desire to put myself into the middle of whatever drunken fight is about to break out. I’m doing a good enough job of tearing myself up inside, thank you very much. Too bad Angel isn’t already available. Less drunken posturing would be pretty nice for everyone.

  “We got together anyway, but she got cold feet. Claimed she was protecting me.”

  He looks at Enzo, who nods. “Hayden is pretty convinced that they’d still be together if it weren’t for our situation with the loan. Despite the risk involved on her part. I’ve met her, and I think he’s probably right. She hasn’t answered his messages or calls in a few weeks, now that I’m taking point on all things FDA, but he says she was pretty torn up the night they broke it off.”

  I can see the look in her eyes right now. I fall asleep to that look every night.

  “You know I can read people. And yeah, I know she cares for me. She’s just trying to protect me from making a bad decision.”

  “But it should be your decision to make,” Devon says. “If you really don’t want your father involved in Angel . . .”

  “I don’t, believe me. But I want her in my life more.”

  He whistles. “You’re in love with her.”

  I don’t deny it.

  “So put it all on the line.”

  “I already did, the night we broke up. I told her I loved her and that I didn’t care what happened if we were caught or if she wanted to recuse herself from our case.”

  Taking a sip of his drink, Devon considers my words.

  Enzo rolls his eyes as if to say, Don’t take dating advice from him. And yeah, we all know that Devon’s not usually a one-woman kind of guy, but I want his take anyway.

  “She said she’d wait until our case is closed. Which could take up to two years with the post-approval monitoring,” I think to add.

  Devon lifts his hand up, palm raised. “What the fuck? Are you serious?”

  “Yeah. And I said I would wait for her.”

  Although we never did discuss the terms. But Ada seems to have made that pretty clear since. No communication. So I’m not exactly sure how well this extended separation will work.

  “Dude, go big or go home.”

  “Meaning?”

  “If you guys are actually planning to wait two years, just rip off the Band-Aid now.”

  Has he not been listening? I tried that approach, and she wasn’t having it.

  “What do you expect me to do? I told her how I feel.”

  “Talk is cheap.”

  Enzo laughs. “You’re the king of idioms tonight.”

  Devon makes a face at him before turning back to me. “All I’m saying is, if you’re this miserable, and you really do love her, show her you’re serious.”

  Show her you’re serious.

  Finally, I catch his meaning. And the thought has crossed my mind more than once in the last few weeks.

  “Are you suggesting,” Enzo asks dryly, “that Hayden propose to the woman who just broke up with him?”

  “I’m suggesting it because apparently the only reason they’re not together is that she’s sacrificing her own happiness so he can retain complete control of his share of the company. That’s a grand gesture. He should make one too. Show her he’s not just full of hot air.” Devon turns to me. “No offense, but you do have a history of sweet-talking your way into things.”

  I actually find myself smiling. “I won’t deny it.”

  “You really think this is a good plan?” Enzo asks.

  I don’t answer right away because it’s a loaded question. Proposing marriage to a woman isn’t something to take lightly. Especially when the woman in question has just dumped you and there’s a much greater likelihood she’ll say no than yes.

  But I guess that’s what Devon means by taking a chance.

  In the end, there’s not much to think about really. I love Ada Flemming and want to be with her for the rest of my life. I can’t actually imagine my future without her in it.

  If she says no, then so be it. But at least she’ll know without a shadow of a doubt where I stand.

  “Who wants to come ring shopping with me?”

  35

  Ada

  “Thanks for meeting me,” I huff out through breaths.

  As Karlene and I run along the Hudson, I thank my lucky stars it’s a cloudy day.

  “No problem. Although I warned you,” Karlene says. “I’ve been doing more walking than running. I’m not sure how long I’ll last. Nice shirt, by the way.”

  I slow my pace, looking down at Hayden’s tee. Why do I torture myself with the reminder? “We can walk if you want.”

  Actually, I know exactly why.

  “No, that’s okay. I’m actually curious how long I’ll last.”

  Noon is basically the worst time of the day to run in the summer, and even with the clouds, today is no different. The air feels muggy and heavy, like rain might be coming. It matches my mood just perfectly.

  “You missed it last night. Qasim was on a roll.”

  A few of our colleagues went out to a karaoke bar together, which is unusual for a Saturday. We usually stick to happy hour since a lot of people don’t live in Manhattan and commute to work. Once Friday hits, people scatter.

  “I bet. What did he sing?”

  She gives me the side-eye, not answering my question. “You can’t go on like this, Ada.”

  “Yes, I can.”

  We nod to a runner passing us in the opposite direction.

  “You look like someone told you that you can’t eat chocolate or drink wine for the rest of your life.”

  I’d give up both to be with Hayden.

  “Or like someone who made a really bad decision and can’t see her way out of it.”

  While I sought out Karlene because I wanted company, I’m not really in the mood to get into it. I was hoping to keep the conversation on her. But something stops me from changing the subject the way I’ve done for nearly three weeks now.

  “I told you I was going to.”

  “What the hell, Ada? Who decides to make a bad decision? That doesn’t even make sense.”

  Agreed. But what choice did I have? Sometimes you don’t get to choose between a good decision and a bad one. Sometimes there are only bad options.

  “I know you think you had to do it, but . . .” She trails off.

  “No buts. I’d feel even worse if I messed up their business.”

  Karlene picks up the pace, so I do too.

  “At least answer his messages. You keep staring at your phone like a sad puppy dog. It’s so obvious you want to talk to him. Maybe you can come to some kind of agreement?”

  “Yeah, right. The last time we did that it took all of two meetups for me to end up inviting him to a romantic weekend getaway.”

  Every time I think of our time in Skaneateles, I feel physically ill. Because I’m the reason I can’t see him anymore. Me. I made that call.

  The whole situation seriously blows.

  “Are you really going to wait two years for him? I
mean, like not date anyone?”

  A mother runs by with a stroller. Funny, I never really noticed them before. But I’m suddenly seeing strollers everywhere. I think about my discussion with Hayden that day on the bench. It surprised me to hear him talk about kids that day, especially knowing his changed stance on having a family has something to do with me.

  “Well?” Karlene presses, bringing me back to real life from Mr. Sexy Eyes La-La Land.

  “We didn’t really talk about specifics.” When I look at Karlene, I can tell she’s feeling the effects of her yo-yo pacing.

  “Are you trying for intervals? ’Cause if you are, that’s fine.”

  She laughs. “I can get myself amped up, but it never lasts long. When I need motivation to pick up the pace, I imagine there’s a camera crew filming me. I ever mention that?”

  This is why I love her.

  “A camera crew?”

  She slows to a fast walk, so I do the same.

  “Yeah, like following us. You know?”

  I shake my head. “No, I don’t have any clue what you’re talking about.”

  “Well, that makes two of us. You and Hayden have worked out the most cockamamie plan in the world. Let’s wait for each other, for some unknown period of time. Meanwhile, we can’t text, even to decide if we can date other people. Like seriously. What the hell?”

  I wish I knew.

  So I’m honest with her.

  “Kar, I don’t trust myself to open the lines of communication. To talk to him. To see him. I don’t think I could stop. So I’d find myself in the same position—forced to choose between feeling like shit for dating someone I shouldn’t be dating or telling Eleanor and putting Hayden in an impossible situation.”

  She looks at me strangely. Almost as if she knows something.

  “You’re in love with him?”

  “Obviously.”

  “And if it weren’t for his loan agreement with his father?”

  My answer is automatic. “I’d tell Eleanor at least part of the truth, recuse myself, and I’d be with him. Now. Not in two years.”

  Something is off with her. I can feel it.

  “You look weird,” I tell her.

  “Thanks,” she says with a smile.

  “No, seriously. Is there something you’re not telling me?”

  For a second I think I’m onto something, and that she’s about to spill, but then Karlene points to a building across the street.

  “Yes, there is. I only agreed to come out here so we could get one of those pineapple smoothies. Isn’t that the place we went after our last run?”

  Maybe I’ve become paranoid in addition to depressed, or it might just be lack of sleep at work, but I could swear Karlene is avoiding answering me directly.

  Still, a pineapple smoothie does sound good. So I let her steer me off the path after an extremely short run.

  “Come on, this will cheer you up.”

  I’m sure it will be delicious, but I seriously doubt it will make me feel any better. There’s only one thing that will, and he happens to be off-limits.

  36

  Hayden

  I’m more nervous today than the day we broke up, when I could tell something was wrong.

  I’m worried she’ll be mad at me for deceiving her.

  That she’ll walk away before I have the chance to talk.

  That she’ll say no or, even worse, change her mind about me entirely and decide I’m too much trouble.

  But the wheels have been set in motion. The owners of L’aile have been great. Granted, they’re being paid well for it, but still. I’m grateful for what they’ve done on such short notice.

  My phone buzzes. It’s Karlene.

  Almost there

  I put it back in my pocket and stand. The minute Ada walks through the doors to this outside area, she’ll see me and . . . what? Turn and walk away?

  I’m about ready to vomit. My stomach is turning, Nanny Mary’s words from last week ringing in my ear.

  You’re a good man, Hayden.

  When I told my parents what I planned, they weren’t thrilled, but they didn’t flip. Which is more than I expected. I wonder what they’ll think if I call back and tell them, Psych. Not engaged after all.

  The moment I’ve been waiting for all week, three weeks actually, is here. The door opens, and Ada’s standing there in her running clothes, similar to that day in my apartment.

  So incredibly beautiful.

  “What the—?” She turns to Karlene, my new confidant. Ring sizer and shopper. The one who helped me arrange all of this.

  “You knew about this,” Ada accuses.

  Please don’t leave, I ask silently.

  “Just listen to him,” Karlene says.

  Bless her.

  Ada turns to me as the door closes behind her friend, who gently pulls my lioness toward me. And that’s exactly what she looks like right now, her eyes flashing with anger for having been deceived.

  But there’s something else there too. Something that gives me hope.

  “Ada, please. Just give me a few minutes. Henry’s waiting outside if you want to leave after we talk. He’ll take you back home. Or wherever else you and Karlene want to go. But please just give me ten minutes. That’s all I’m asking.”

  She takes a few steps toward me, then stops.

  “How did you . . . how did Karlene . . .”

  “I called her at work and begged her to help me.”

  “To help you?” she repeats.

  God, she’s lovely. I’m so in love with her, and I very well might lose her today.

  But not without a fight.

  “Just a few minutes. Please,” I beg, holding out my hand. I’m achingly aware that I’m not just begging for her to talk to me, but to love me. To become my wife.

  She takes my hand despite the fact that she’s nervous. Kind of like that day when she picked me up at my hotel, before we got to Skaneateles. Nervous because she’s torn between doing what she wants and what she thinks is right.

  Her hand fits perfectly in mine as I lead her to the table where we had lunch that fateful day.

  As we approach it, I grab the black velvet box from the table and don’t waste even a second.

  Bending to one knee, I let go of her hand, hold up the box, and pop it open. I waffled between simplicity and extravagance, wanting to do her justice but also to let Ada know all of what I had would now be hers. But the ring’s design that I’d stressed over doesn’t matter now. Nothing does but her answer to my question.

  “You already know I love you, Ada, but I’m not sure I made it clear how much. I believe we’re meant for each other. And I don’t want to wait two years. I told you I didn’t care about anything as much as being with you, and this time I’ll say it more clearly. I want you to tell Eleanor about us. I want us to be out in the open. I want it more than anything in the world. Ada, please believe me.”

  I can’t read her the way I usually can, but I forge on anyway.

  “I want you to be my wife. Ada, will you marry me?”

  I can’t feel my fingers or toes. Everything is numb. I hold my breath, waiting for her answer.

  Trust yourself, I say silently. Trust me.

  “Your company,” she says finally, tears in her eyes.

  “Will be fine. I promise.”

  37

  Ada

  I promise.

  I want to sag down to my feet. Hayden will not break his promise to me, I know it as well as my own name. He truly believes it will work out.

  He believes in me.

  Just like I believe in him.

  I’ve spent the last few weeks fighting my own instincts, thinking it for the best, and never once did I pause to consider that maybe I should trust them instead. That maybe I should trust him too.

  “Yes.” I reach down and pull him up to me. “Yes, Hayden. I will marry you.”

  He’s stunned, but no more so than I am.

  Is this really happening?
>
  When tears stream down his cheeks, I know for sure everything he’s told me is true. He loves me, and he will never dishonor me. He wants me to be his wife.

  We’re like two blubbering fools. I dry his tears, and he dries mine, and it’s then I realize that I’ve never told him how I feel.

  “I love you, Hayden. So very much. I just . . .”

  More tears run down my face as he pulls away and takes out the most beautiful ring I’ve ever seen.

  “I just wanted to do the right thing,” I finish lamely. He slides the ring on my finger, and surprisingly, it fits perfectly.

  His answer is to kiss me, and as our lips touch, a cheer rises from the window of the restaurant.

  “We have an audience,” I tell him.

  Hayden looks toward the building.

  “We do. And before they come out—” he pulls my chin toward him, “—I need you to know, you’ve made me the happiest man alive. I love you, Doctor Flemming.”

  I think about our first meeting and laugh.

  “You were so damn arrogant.”

  “Am so damn arrogant,” he corrects me. “And obviously not great at being modest.” He waves a hand around the empty restaurant, which he’s clearly rented out for the occasion. “But I’ll work on it. And my many other flaws.”

  I turn serious, needing him to understand.

  “I fell in love with you, Hayden Tanner. All of you. I would never ask you to change.”

  He raises his brows.

  “OK, maybe there’s a few things from when we first met that are off-limits, like the hordes of women you dated.” The corners of his eyes crinkle at that. “But mostly, I just want you.”

  I look down at my hand and wiggle my fingers. The diamond glitters in the sunlight.

  Am I seriously engaged to be married?

  “This is going to be hard to hide,” I say, a little giddy now, even though I’m nervous.

  When I look up, Hayden holds my gaze, as he tends to do.

  “I don’t want you to hide it. I was serious. Unless you want to take it off, then that’s OK with me too. I realize there are implications for you as well.”